Is Your Inner Saboteur Keeping You Out Of Shape and Unhappy?
Do you ever wonder why you have such a hard time sticking to a plan to get fit or lose weight, grow your business, have an amazing relationship or make more money, no matter what you try?
Here’s the secret… your subconscious upper limit ceiling holds you back from the things you want to achieve. The problem is, you don’t realize the ceiling is there, so every time you make a little headway, it seems something happens, or you do something that sets you back. Does that sound familiar?
For twenty years in my work as a productivity consultant, I observed just what we’re talking about here. Many clients experienced temporary change, but were unable to make true lasting change, which requires not only new habits and behaviors, but also a mindset shift. If that sounds like you, and you’ve tried without success to reach your personal and business goals in the past, chances are it’s not your fault. You were probably using the same old methods most people do… trying to change your results by using logic and “willpower.”
I did the same thing. For many years I struggled with my weight, health and fitness. I’d try a new way of eating, I’d exercise regularly, but I’d still see only marginal success. It was frustrating and demoralizing. But then I began to study the science behind the upper limit ceiling, and I figured out how to break through my own hidden beliefs about myself. I was able to consistently stick with my training and eating plan like I’ve never been able to before. In ten months, I lost almost 30 pounds, completely transformed my body, and experienced a seismic mental shift that changed my life.
Here’s what I learned about the upper limit ceiling…
Your conscious logical mind wants great things for you such as money, success, health, a strong fit body, a great relationship, and happiness. Creating these good things requires you to grow and change. This is where the conflict is, because your upper limit ceiling lives in your subconscious mind, which doesn’t like growth or change, because growth and change are by definition unfamiliar, unsafe and uncomfortable territory. As soon as you begin to see some success in an area, your subconscious gets triggered and it sabotages you.
Self-sabotage comes in many forms. It might be why you procrastinate, worry, are impatient or angry, pick fights, never finish projects, are critical of yourself and others, are surrounded by clutter, or you don’t manage your time well. Unless you identify your upper limit ceiling, you’ll stay stuck in the same frustrating and self-defeating cycle you’re in now, never reaching the level of fitness, health, money, love, success or happiness you so badly desire. .
You may be curious how the subconscious upper limit ceiling got there. Well, like most everything else in our minds gets there: CHILDHOOD!
As children, we’re blank slates, primed and ready to absorb and internalize beliefs from the people and environment we’re immersed in. If your parents practiced a particular religion, odds are you did too. If your parents believed a political point of view, chances are you did too. Until you grew up and moved away, of course. As an adult, you may have begun exploring and questioning for yourself whether those childhood beliefs were accurate or aligned with your own values.
However, the unconscious beliefs you absorbed as a young child aren’t so easy to recognize and question as the religious or political beliefs are. The beliefs that get installed in your subconscious when you’re a child, reside deep in your mind and create the framework for your future. Children absorb beliefs like a sponge absorbs water and even the most loving and well-meaning families unintentionally install limiting beliefs in their children.
For example, you may have grown up in a home where the conversation was frequently about a lack of money and frugality, which in turn created limiting beliefs around money for you, and therefore, you always struggle to have enough money.
Or you may have seen your parents argue a lot, which created a belief that a “normal” marriage is fraught with tension and disagreement. This belief may have led you to unconsciously attract a partner with whom you pick and argue a lot.
Or perhaps you were the first born and as a child you were often called “bossy” so you learned to rein in the leader part of yourself and disown it for fear of not being loved or approved of.
There are so many ways subconscious beliefs can manifest in life and these are just a few! They show up in your work, your relationships and yes, they even make it hard to stick to a new health and fitness program. The funny thing is, even though consciously you want success in these areas SO BADLY, and logically you know what to do to make your life better, you still fail over and over again. Hellooooo??? Who among us hasn’t experienced a New Year’s resolution failure? «
Now that you know why you’re struggling and what the upper limit ceiling is, how do you dismantle it and soar?
We tend to discount the events of our childhood as “in the past” and from a linear standpoint, they are behind us. However old they are, these false beliefs we learned as children are still very much in play in our adult selves.
If we were coaching together, this is the point where I’d begin to help you dig into identifying and dismantling your hidden beliefs that hold you back. But since we’re not working together yet, you can try a bit on your own! Granted, it’s a challenge to eliminate your upper limit ceiling by yourself, but these steps could be helpful when you feel yourself resisting the GOOD things in your life.
First, be aware of your self-defeating thoughts and actions when they happen. Tune in to yourself, and when you notice you’re resisting something, be curious about it! Say to yourself, “Hmmmm, I wonder why I’m doing this right now…” and let your mind float back to your earliest memories of growing up, as you ask your mind the following questions.
- What am I feeling deeeeeep down in my gut and soul right now that’s making me want to resist what I want and need to do?
- Is it fear? Is it shame? Is it anger? If I succeed wildly in this area, what will happen to my life? Will I lose something or someone? What would my having success in this area mean about me as a person?
- Who or what situation could have installed this false belief in me as a young child?
These questions will help you get into a mindset of deep reflection, and you may receive flashes of memory, insights, or even remember old conversations you had forgotten about. These insights and memories will help you to uncover your unconscious limiting belief so you can recognize it as a falsehood you believed as a young, impressionable child.
It’s a brand new year, and I’d hate to see you experience yet another New Year’s resolution failure! If you have trouble being consistent with your new training or eating program — especially after you’ve begun to see results — open your mind to the hidden beliefs that could be running the show. If you’d like my help, reach out and I’m here to take you through the process, so you can begin crushing your goals and seeing the results you’ve been dreaming of for so long!
-Monica Ricci, CPO
Email: [email protected]